The blue sky

 It was 4.00 pm in the afternoon, I was resting . I still was quite tired from the preparations of Ganesh Chathurthi, which was on the previous day . 

My daughter Sayali and her friend Ruksar were busy doing a photo shoot the entire day . The whole house was full of props, tripods and cameras.

“ Mumma, we are waiting for the natural light to become ambient and thus are  free for a bit “, said Sayali .

“ Okay, I will get you some coffee and snacks”, said I , thinking that they must be hungry. 

“ No, actually, why don’t you dress up and we can do a photo shoot of yours”, came the reply . “ Photo shoot at 61 !! When half my foot is in the grave !!! I have never done one before, even when I got married “, I exclaimed . “ There’s always a first time “, said both Ruksar and Sayali in unison . “ All the more reason for you to do one now “. “ But seriously, why didn’t you get one done when you got married “? Asked Sayali , my very talented and artistic designer daughter. Those days were different, I never had a say and the thought of a pre wedding shoot was totally alien to me “, I answered. “ Come on get up Auntie, let’s look through your wardrobe and find you a gorgeous saree”, said the very talented photographer Ruksar . The entire wardrobe was rummaged, so many sarees were disapproved of , some being too simple while some because of the colour . Finally a shocking pink brocade sari with a turquoise blue border was chosen by them along with matching jewellery . I draped the saree, and put on some basic makeup, which was highlighted by Sayali and Ruksar . They made me wear flowers in the neatly tied bun and hey presto…. I was ready , I looked into the mirror and stared at the unrecognisable image of myself !

We went on the terrace , under the blue sky .  The light breeze was making my Pallu swing , showing off the resplendent brocade work as the sun played hide and seek with the clouds . I was made to pose, laugh candidly, sit , stand , sit yet again , this time with a glass of red wine in my hand . I felt like a retro Bollywood heroine and soon mastered the art of fake laughter while tilting my head backwards or swinging my pallu gently . 

The vast expanse of the blue sky, floating cottony white clouds, the occasional birds soaring in the sky and the gentle breeze,  made me feel care free . As I posed to look upto the  blue sky while smiling candidly  , I realized the vastness of what I could have enjoyed in my youth as a bride  , had I had the wisdom to think about myself . A photoshoot as bride along with my groom wouldn’t have been too much to ask for , like the many other things , which were unthought of, unspoken of and left buried in my heart. 

“ Okay Auntie, I have got some beautiful shots, let pack up your shoot”, said Ruksar. “ Already !”, said I as I looked upon both Sayali and Ruksar, young , bold  and beautiful , their confidence radiating through their body language , their ambitions and dreams as vast and as limitless as the open blue sky .I thanked them profusely as I hugged them and once again looked up to the  vastness of the blue sky, and thanked the  universe for having given me the chance to live a dream which I had never ever dreamt of. 

As the girls packed up, I shed silent tears of joy, gratitude and remorse for what could have been but wasn’t.