Rekindling faith

15th June 2016— a date that will forever stay etched in my memory, for it marked a profound turning point in my life. That day, I lost my beloved husband, Milind. Throughout my life, I was deeply spiritual and religious, placing immense faith in the power of prayers. Yet, during the tumultuous days of June 12th to 15th, no prayer or plea could alter my fate. I was left feeling bereft, helpless, and filled with anger towards God and the universe. In my grief, I ceased praying and stopped lighting the evening lamp. My humble home temple gathered dust; the lamps remained unlit, bearing the remnants of past rituals of faith and devotion.

Life moved forward, but my anger and despair toward the divine grew. I seethed in my grief until, one day—just before Ganesh Chaturthi—I received a WhatsApp image of Shree Siddhivinayak Ganpati from one of my husband's clients. He was elderly, and I remembered feeling a calming aura during our brief interactions. I continued to delete the images without acknowledgment, assuming he would stop once the 10 day festival from Ganesh Chaturthi to Anant Chaturdashi passed. However, even after the festival, he persisted in sending those images daily.

Initially, I resented these reminders, unwilling to accept this subtle path back to faith. But one day, he called me. “Manju ji,” he said softly, “I hope you are feeling better emotionally and able to face your grief.” I hesitated before replying, “Thanks for calling and for the Ganesh images. I’ve moved away from faith.” He gently explained, “The pictures I send are taken during the morning Kakad Aarti. They serve as a reminder that you are not alone in this world. The Ganesha who brought you grief is also the one who will give you strength to overcome it.”

His calm, peaceful voice touched something deep within me. I could picture his serene smile as he spoke, and tears flooded my eyes. I broke down, crying openly, to a person I hardly knew. He let me sob and then kindly suggested, “Why don’t you visit Siddhivinayak temple someday? You might find peace there.” He ended the call peacefully.

From that day, the images of Ganesha continued to arrive daily at 6:00 a.m., filling my mornings with a gentle reminder of hope and strength. Gradually, I felt a shift within me. I decided to visit the Siddhivinayak Temple. Despite the temple’s crowded and chaotic atmosphere on that Sunday morning, witnessing the devotion and participating in prayer stirred something within me. A priest appeared from the crowds and came towards me,” Sit here Tai”, he said. I sat in the corner spot and before I could even thank him, he had disappeared into the crowd. As I sat quietly in a corner, closing my eyes to pray, I felt a quiet reassurance—I had found my path back to faith.

Even now, the pictures keep coming every morning, a blessing in my life. I smile, thank Bappa for the new day, and seek his blessings, grateful for this divine grace that helped mend my broken heart.